Sit with these words and phrases and mine them for their gold as a regular and on-going practice. Treat them as guides to the way, and companions along the path. Tend your relationship with them with filial devotion, allegiance, and loyalty. Emptiness, stillness and silence. Balance and harmony. Sincerity, integrity and self-transparency. Spirit, energy, vitality. Virtue, courage, resiliency, faithfulness. Original-nature. Grace, compassion and peace. Live aligned with them. in light of them, forever.
T.S. Eliot wrote in "The Four Quartets," “We shall not cease from exploration And the end of all our exploring Will be to arrive where we started And know the place for the first time." His idea that "we shall not cease" and "at the end" we will arrive at the beginning, connects me with Carl Jung's idea of "the circumambulation of the self," where there is no direct way to what we seek-- which is to know ourselves and to live in accord with our original nature through all of the conditions and circumstances of our life. Seeking to be is, itself, being, and being here, now, is all we can ever hope to be, and "realized eschatology" is comprehending that the "coming one" has always been with us, and is us, just as we are, particularly just as we are, as one "thus come," like the Buddha under the Bo Tree, right here, right now, and on we go being ourselves, true to our original nature, in every here and now throughout time and beyond time, just by being where we are, doing what needs to be done the way we would do it, knowing there is nothing more to it than that.
"What's worth your time?" is the easiest question to be wrong about. Look around. Everyone you see is wrong about the answer to the question. Being right about the answer would be bad for the economy. Very bad. The culture is geared to giving us 10,000,000... (The zeros go forever) wrong answers to the question to keep us chasing after all that does not satisfy and keep the cash registers on full ca-ching mode. What's worth your time? You are afraid nothing is, right? Nothing comes to mind, so it must be that nothing is worth our time. And we are stuck in a life with nothing to live for and nothing worth doing, so pass the opioids because why not? Because that is so stupid it's nauseating. I'm throwing up just thinking about it. "I don't know what's worth my time, so it must be nothing. Pass the pills!" "Pass the pills" is the quick fix to the pain of being alive and not knowing why we are alive or for what we are alive. Bearing the pain is the solution to all of our problems today. Sit still. Be quiet. And empty yourself of your fear of emptiness, of your fear of pain. Open yourself to the silence, and wait. Waiting is a test of your mettle. We have to have what it takes to do what is asked for, and siting in the silence is easy compared to doing what needs to be done "without hope, without witness, without reward." (Steven Moffat, "Dr. Who"), which is what doing what is worth our time requires. We have to bear the pain all the way. So, open yourself to the silence and wait. You can go about your life while waiting, but remember you are waiting. You are waiting for something to stir in the silence, for something to arise, appear, emerge, wink at you and whisper your name. And, like that, it's gone, and you are left to wonder if something happened, or if you just imagined it. This is another test, because you are as likely to dismiss what occurs as it is to flash out of sight. It's playing with you to see if you can be trusted. By now, you have rejected it 1,000... (And all those zeros) times, and it is tired of being ignored. This is called pay-back time. Keep sitting, waiting, watching. As you go about your life. It may appear in a dream, the kind of dream that cannot be ignored, or forgotten. It may appear out of nowhere, as you turn a corner, and drive past it, and are unable to get it out of your mind. This is destiny crossing your path. We don't go seeking our destiny, we wait for it to come seeking us, and we prepare ourselves to know an open door when we see it, by looking at every door that comes along. When the door with our name on it opens, we walk through. The first step is the hardest. The next most important thing is refusing to quit in the service of that which calls our name. "Whoever puts their hand to the plow, and looks back, has to remember how essential it is to not turn around, but to trust themselves to the path that is their path no matter what." Living with troth for and trust in the way brings help where we didn't think help would be, and invisible forces seem to be protecting us and guiding us along the way. We cannot push our luck, but we can trust it, and we will find confirmation in 1,000... (And all those zero's) ways all along the way. All it takes is trusting that it will be so, and when the door opens, walk through.