October 31, 2021


Maple Lane 11/04/2011 Oil Paint Rendered– Greensboro, North Carolina
Sitting still,
being quiet,
emptying ourselves
of fear, desire and duty,
waiting, watching,
present and awake,
we allow our life 
to find us
and invite us
to come to life.

Being alive comes with
strings attached.
It is not the life
of anyone's dreams.

Everyone's dreams
are bigger than life.
"They will never stay
on the farm,
once they have seen
Gay Paree!"
We all want 
what we have no business having.

We have to give up
the life of our dreams
and settle for just being alive,
doing what needs to be done,
bringing our best to bear
on each moment,
in each situation as it arises,
and letting that be that,
allowing nature to take its course
into the next situation,
and all those following.

No fortune.
No glory.
No splendor.
No drama.
No wondrous, joyous crescendo,
with standing ovations,
and everlasting fame.

Just another situation,
and another one after that,
lived to the fullest
all our life long.



Pumpkins 91 10/20/2021 Oil Paint Rendered — Pike Nursery, Charlotte, North Carolina
What will it take
to make our life worth living?

What is the source of dissatisfaction
and discontent?

Except for what, things would be wonderful?

What do you want that you don't have?
That you can't get?
That you have no hope of ever having?
If you had it,
what would you want then?

There is always something else to want.
There is no end to wanting.
How can you re-think,
re-imagine your life
to take endless wanting
into account
and keep it from being the one thing
determining your peace and contintment
with your life as it is?

Why let wanting run--and ruin--your life?

What does wanting know?
Why should wanting be in charge?
Why is having what we want
the determining factor
in being balanced and in harmony
with how things are in our life?

What would we be doing 
that we cannot do right here, right now,
if we had everything we ever wanted?
How is having everything we ever wanted
going to improve our ability
to be fully alive in the moment of our living
in each situation as it arises?

In what ways are we being inhibited
in responding to what the situation is calling for
because we don't have everything we want--
or even half of what we want?

How does not having what we want 
keep us from being alive to the time and place
of our living?

What is keeping us from being alive to the time and place
of our living?

Published by jimwdollar

I'm retired, and still finding my way--but now, I don't have to pretend that I know what I'm doing. I retired after 40.5 years as a minister in the Presbyterian Church USA, serving churches in Louisiana, Mississippi and North Carolina. I graduated from Austin Presbyterian Theological Seminary, in Austin, Texas, and Northwestern State University in Natchitoches, Louisiana. My wife, Judy, and I have three daughters and five granddaughters within about twenty minutes from where we live--and are enjoying our retirement as much as we have ever enjoyed anything.

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