Begin paying attention to your situations, noticing when one goes over into another. Our situations carry us with them, becoming our life, so that our life is simply a string of situations, one going over into the next, from birth to death. Each situation has its own movement, its own pace and timing, with each one being a chapter in our day. If we see ourselves dancing with our situations, instead of struggling to master them, or direct them, or orchestrate, choreograph, manage them, we will be putting ourselves in the position to influence our situations, rather than trying to control them. Control is the prerogative of mystery and wonder-- of forces quite beyond us and unknown to us-- quite apart from our will and desire. Our role is not to have our way, but to assist the unfolding of our life in the situations that comprise it, by reading each situation in light of what is happening there and what needs to happen in response, and doing what we can do in the service of what is called for with the gifts/genius/specialties/shtick/etc. that come with us from the womb, and are "the face that was ours before we were born," which is to say, our original nature. Being true to ourselves in responding to the needs of the situation, with sincerity and spontaneity, is what we bring to the moment, as blessing and grace, by offering what we have to give to the occasions that need exactly that, and participating in the making of miracles (unknowingly assisting the forces quite beyond us and unknown to us) throughout each day.
Our work is to put ourselves in accord with the moment, moment by moment, throughout our day and our life. Every moment, of every situation, is asking something of us. Is asking for our cooperation and support in some way. We generally go into our moments, our situations, with agenda in one hand, and a bullhorn in the other, ordering, arraigning, manipulating, orchestrating, directing, managing, controlling, and living toward a particular outcome that we have clearly and firmly in mind. It is Win Or Lose in every situation. Cooperation and concordance have no place in our approach to our life, and therein lies the root of all our problems. Our Way is not The Way more often than not, seldom if ever. Assisting The Way is staying out of The Way more often than not, always and forever. What is trying to happen here? What needs to happen here? How can we help as midwives delivering a baby? Every situation is a new birth in the making, which we abort, not knowing what we are doing knowing what we are doing, or would be doing, if people would only get out of our way and listen to us.
New Englanders have a saying, "I am not carrying this day one step beyond where it needs to go!" Lao Tzu said, around 500 BCE), "Do your work and step back. Knowing when to stop is the wisdom of the ages." Knowing what our work is, and knowing when it is done, and when it is time to move on is all the knowing we need to know. And, if we think our work has anything at all to do with making money, or being compensated in any way, we need to go back to the first day and start over knowing nothing.
Putting ourselves in accord with The Way in each situation as it arises has to do not only with what we do, but also with how we do it. Getting our attitude right is essential to getting our actions right. Doing what needs to be done wholeheartedly-- as though our heart in in what we are doing, whether it is or not-- is the cornerstone in Accord. Sincerity and integrity require us to "fake it until we make it" from the heart-- faking it all the way. Faking it so well that not even we can tell if our heart is in it or not. This is what Jesus meant when he said, "Don't let your left hand know what your right hand is doing." He is saying, "Do it like you mean it, whether you mean it or not." Live like we mean it, whether we mean it or not! That is the attitude required to get our attitude as it needs to be. To get ourselves as we need to be, in doing what needs to be done, the way it needs to be done, when it needs to be done, because it needs to be done. This means that when your in-laws come for a visit they think they are welcome every time.
I am confident that the phrase, "Let the Force be with you," is not to be found/heard in any of the Star Wars movies. "Trust the Force, Luke," is as close as it gets. But "Let the Force be with you," is an accurate depiction of how the Force is thought of in all of the movies. And I have an issue with that. Force is militant, first and foremost. It has a militant ring to it, and though "force" is a neutral enough word when used for gravity, light, and electricity, it's association with forcing someone to do something against their will is too obnoxious to use in reference to the "Light Side," in opposition to "The Dark Side." Forces at war with each other is much too reflective of our general attitude about good guys and bad guys and the right side winning all of the time. One quick glance at the natural world and we see that "good" and "bad" are strictly points of view, with no morally significant meaning beyond what we make up and apply at will. Nature is morally neutral. In the natural world, the Law of the Fishes applies, without preference regarding the outcomes: "The big fish eat the little fish, and the little fish swim through the holes in the nets that haul the big fish to the cannery." No Light and Dark at war with each other through time. That was invented by Zarathustra between 1500 and 1000 BCE. It came right out of his imagination, and that is all there is to it. All of the references to it from that point on have been embellishments of Zarathustra's original idea. The is no warfare between the Forces of Good and the Forces of Evil, and use of the word "force" triggers all of these false references to Zarathustra's fantasies. So, from my point of view, "force" is not to be used. I much prefer "Flow." "Let the Flow be with you!" "Go with the Flow!" "Be One with the Flow!" "Flow with your life, and be well!" ... The possibilities are many, and are much more accurate than any associated with "force."