01

My 40.5 years of service
as a minister
in the Presbyterian Church (USA)
notwithstanding,
people occasionally wonder
if I am a Christian,
and sometimes say,
"How can you consider yourself 
to be a Christian?"

My stock reply goes like this:

"If you measure your Christianity
by the Westminster Confession of Faith,
including the Larger and Shorter Catechism,
the Apostle's Creed,
the Nicene Creed,
and any collection of hymns
ever compiled,
I am most certainly NOT a Christian
by that standard,
and am proud to not be one.

But.

If you measure your Christianity
by the Sermon on the Mount,
the Parable of the Prodigal Son,
the Parable of the Good Samaritan,
the passage about
'In as much as you done it,
or not done it,
to the very least of humanity,
you have done it, or not done it
to me,'
and the Eden-Gethsemane axis,
I am every bit as much of a Christian
as Jesus was,
and am very proud to be so."

They generally leave the conversation
with no idea of what I'm talking about.
Oblivious to the likelihood
that I am as close to Jesus
as they are ever going to be
in this life,
if not also in whatever awaits
on the other side of death.

And, if that is all they care 
to put into their side of the conversation,
I'm not going to argue with them
about what is and is not "Christian."

I have things I need to be doing,
and "shooting the breeze" 
is not one of them.

–0–

02

I live to do what I'm doing,
and upon retirement
I dedicated myself to solitude and silence,
which I define as having nothing beyond
conducting necessary business
to do with anyone not in my immediate 
or extended family.

The vow of solitude and silence
has served me well,
enabling me to reduce complexity
and diminish noise,
and allowing me the time and space
required to listen and look
for what is important
and for what needs to be done about it
in each situation as it arises--
and to devote myself to its service
using the tools 
(virtues, gifts, proclivities, shtick,
genius, daemon [sounds like "diamond"], etc.
that belong to my original nature
and came with me from the womb)
at my disposal
to do what can be done
about what needs to be done.

The distance I have inserted 
between myself and life as it is,
has helped immensely
in maintaining my balance and harmony,
my spirit, energy and vitality,
my perspective and my response-ability
in the "imminent and transcendent"
aspects of my life,
and I am glad to be able 
to live here and now
in light of,
and in relationship with,
the Mystery at the Heart of Life and Being.

Retirement is a huge assist
in the work of being present to
and in accord with
the Way and its Virtues,
but that work can begin 
at any point in our life.

It is only a matter of
how we use our time
and where we place our attention,
and those are choices
we make in every moment
of every day.

Being aware of what we are choosing to do
with the time that is ours 
is the gate that opens and closes
to how we will be and not be
in each situation as it arises.

Live to never open 
or close the gate
unknowingly,
and you will be a friend
and companion of the Way
all along the way.

–0–

03

Walkin' Jim Stoltz said, "One must be intent upon the path."
It is only ourselves and the path.
Keep to the path!
Stay on the path!
Become--and remain--one with the path!

This is what "living in accord with the Tao"
comes down to:
Being intent upon the path!

Being right here right now upon the path!
Just doing what needs to be done--
and often that comes down to
the next thing.

Sometimes it is the next step.
"One step at a time"
is more than an AA slogan.
It is the way of remaining in contact
with The Way!

Live on!
Pass it on!

It doesn't matter why.

Trust yourself to the that.
To the this.
To the path.
Forget about why.

To ask why is to disengage 
from this path right here, right now.

Do not lose the focus on the path!
"One must be intent upon the path!"

Pursuing "Why?" breaks our concentration.
We stray from the path.
We lose the way.
We wander in the wasteland
wondering why, why, why.

Stop!

Stop asking "Why?"
Get back on the path!
"One must be intent upon the path!"
"One step at a time."
All along the way.

01

The worst of times call for
living from our Center
as much as any times.

The Center is the Source
of Life and Light and Being
in every time,
through all times.

The more practiced we are
in finding and living from
the Center,
the better able we will be
to meet our circumstances,
rise to every occasion
and do what needs to be done
moment-to-moment
in each situation as it arises,
which is all that can be asked
of any of us at any time.

And we come equipped for that task
straight from the womb.

We connect with the Center
by way of the Silence.

Enter the Silence for twenty minutes
at least once a day,
and sit tight,
stand pat,
ride it out,
looking and listening
for what stirs,
arises,
emerges,
occurs,
transpires,
beckons,
is revealed
by,
in
and through the Silence.

Trust yourself to respond
naturally,
organically,
spontaneously,
automatically,
appropriately,
properly
to the revelations
and realizations
out of your original nature,
which is the face that was yours
before your grandparents were born.

It takes practice to get this down,
and to become a sage of your own reckoning.
Don't wait for the time to be upon you
before you begin making preparations.

We will be asked to live from our Center
like we have never been asked before.
The wisest advice through all the ages
is always to be ready,
for we don't know the time
of what is coming,
but the Center is always ready for anything,
everything,
all the time.

–0–

02

That's the Piedmont down below. 

Just beyond the horizon 
lies the Coastal Plain 
and then the Atlantic Ocean. 

It's all one thing, you know. 

It is easy to think that oceans 
are different from mountains, 
and that Republicans are different 
from Democrats, 
and that straight people are different
from LGBTQ people,
and that white people are different
from people of color,
but, 
if you back up a bit, 
you lose the distinctions, 
and it is one world, 
one universe, 
just not the same one. 

Yin isn't yang, 
yang isn't yin. 
But they are one. 

Just like oceans and mountains are one, 
but not the same one, 
and Republicans and Democrats are one, 
but not the same one. 
Etc.

It takes a little practice 
to see the oneness, 
but once you see it, 
that's all there is.

Then, all that remains
is living as though it is so.

Because it is so.

–0–

03

Stop thinking of original sin,
and begin thinking of original nature.

There never was a Garden of Eden.
There has always been Original Nature.

Our original nature is who we are born to be,
how we are built to be.

This is the Antithetical Mask W.B. Yeats
talked about
that exists as the counter-weight
to the Primary Mask handed to us
by the culture we are born into.

Certain things are expected/required of us
by the context into which we are born,
which violate the drift of our nature,
and force us to betray the truth of our own being.

If you are gay, 
you know what I mean.

If you are not gay,
you still know what I mean
if you connect with all the ways
you are asked to deny yourself
and be who you are not
throughout your life.

Getting back to Eden
is getting back to who we are 
from the beginning.
To do that,
we have to pass through 
the heart of Gethsemane
and across the face off Golgotha.

The evangel, 
the good news,
of the Christian message
could have been told as
"The path back to who you are."
But, instead, it became,
"The way of escaping who you are,
and becoming who you ought to be."

The Christian Church
is the victory of the Primary Mask
over the Antithetical Mask.
It is a betrayal we have orchestrated
against ourselves.

Now is the time for confession,
repentance,
atonement
and reconciliation
with ourselves--
and the work of transforming
our relationship with ourselves,
our life,
and all others
into all they may have been
from the beginning.

Stop thinking of original sin,
and start thinking of original nature--
and live to be who you are
in the time left for living.

–0–

04

What needs to happen
is all we need to know.
Then there is only doing it.
As best we can.
To the extent that it is possible.

If you need someone to sing at your wedding,
I will be no use to you.
I also cannot play the alto sax.
Or any other sax.

The list of things I cannot do is 
right up there 
with the list of things I wish I could do.

I am stuck with what I can do.
So are you.

Are we doing what we can do
with what needs to be done?
That's our question to answer.

Of all the things we can do,
what is our shtick?
Do we put it into play daily?
How long has it been
since your shtick saw the light of day?
Or the dark of night?

Why not do the things we do best?
The things we love doing?
The things we are here to do?
The things that are ours to do?

A day in which we do not do
a single thing that is ours to do
is a day we may as well not have lived.

How many of those days are there in a lifetime?
To pile those days up in a corner
and sit considering the corner
is to sit pondering a catastrophe.
A travesty.
We bring shame on ourselves
by living a day without doing what is ours to do.
It is a shame we will bear
through all eternity.

We have from now until the time we die
to compensate for lost days
by busting it with the things we do best
throughout what remains 
of the time left for living.

Be who you are here to be,
doing what you are here to do,
relentlessly,
consistently,
compulsively,
as though you can't help it.

Like a dog wagging its tail
(Alan Stacel).

01

There is balance and harmony.
There is resistance and assistance.
There is what we do to pay the bills,
and there is what we pay the bills to do.

Three pairs of choices.

How we work out the ratios among the three
tells the tale.

The tale is the one we are spinning
with our decisions and actions
throughout our life.

Our life is our art.
The three pairs of choices
are our tools.

Balance and harmony are our guides.
We know how we are doing
by keeping an eye on our balance and harmony.

Resistance and assistance
are where we make the adjustments
to get balance and harmony in sync and accord.

What we do to pay the bills
and what we pay the bills to do
is the biggie.

We have to make enough money to pay the bills
and what we pay the bills to do
reveals whether or not we are running up
the right bills.

Running up the right bills
reflects assistance, balance and harmony.

Running up the wrong bills
reflects discord, chaos, death spirals,
flame outs and free falling.

Right and wrong in terms of what?
Assistance/resistance in terms of what?
Balance and harmony in the service of what?

Our life and what we do with it.

It all hinges on being right
about what we do with our life.

Sin is being wrong about
what is important.
Repentance is changing our mind about
what is important--
as many times as it takes
to get it right.
We know when it is right
when balance and harmony
are in sync and accord.

Other indicators of it being right
are spirit, energy and vitality.
A regular reading of our
spirit, energy and vitality levels
is a clear picture of how well
we are living our life.

We have to be able to read the signs.
Balance, harmony,
spirit, energy, life.

They let us know when we are
on the beam
and when we are off it.
When we are aligned with The Way
and when we are wandering through the Wasteland.

The clashing rocks
and the heaving waves
of the wine dark sea
are also hints that we may
need to consider making some adjustments
in what we are doing
and how we are going about doing it.

The fundamental adjustment
is making changes in our relationship
with ourselves, our life and other people.
We have to quit doing what we are doing
and start doing something else instead.

What?
How?
Time will tell.
Experiment.
Explore.
Sit with The Silence.
Take up the practice of mindful awareness
(The Jon Kabat-Zinn YouTube videos--
shortest ones first--are great guides here).
Listen to your heart,
your body,
your nighttime dreams
your daytime hunches, nudges, 
realizations, inspirations...

Our work is to find our life and live it.
To know what works and what doesn't work.
To know what needs to be done and do it.
To stay on the beam
and to keep to The Way.

And we have all that we need 
to find what we need
to do it all.

We only have to start paying attention
to what's what
and let that be our guide along The Way.

01

If I were writing the script,
on Judgment Day
we would have to forgive ourselves.

And live with what we have done
and failed to do
throughout forever.

I would call it The Reckoning.
Or, maybe, Coming Clean.

We would have to make it right
with ourselves.

It would be heaven and it would be hell.

Those who manage it 
would be in heaven.

Those who don't
would be in hell.

Betraying ourselves
is the worst kind of betrayal.

Those of us who might need more time
could start making our peace with ourselves
now.

–0–

02

This is called attending the silence,
observing the silence,
listening to the silence,
receiving the silence,
reading the silence,
being attuned to the silence--
all without engaging the silence,
being kidnapped by the silence,
being shanghaied by the silence,
being hijacked by the silence,
being victimized by the silence,
being run-over by the silence,
etc.

Here's how it works:
Sit still and be quiet for twenty minutes,
once or twice a day,
opening yourself to the silence
and paying attention to what arises there
without succumbing to the experience.

Your role is that of an interested observer.
Just watch what comes to mind
for twenty minutes.
Then, process the experience
by asking what the scenarios/situations/memories
presented
and what response did you make,
either to them if you were watching 
yourself respond,
or to them as you watched what was unfolding,
and what response do you think would be appropriate now.

Now connect what occurred/arose during the silence
with what is going on presently in your life.
In what ways is your real life situation
similar to what the silence presented?

How are the responses called for by the silence
applicable to your real life situation?

You can also use this same procedure
in working with your nighttime dreams.

What comes up in the silence--
either waking or dreaming--
and what response is called for there
can be connected to what is going on in your life.
You make the connections.
You find the relationships.
You create the meaning
by taking this and relating it to that,
in a "Thou Art That, Then Is Now"
kind of way.

Our dreams and visions and mental wanderings
are screens upon which we project meanings
that are pertinent to ourselves
and to our life situations,
much like ink blots or faces/objects/animals we "see" 
in the clouds
or in the constellations.

And, in this way, are reflections of things
we might explore in ourselves.

It is as though ourselves
are sending us coded messages
through what we see
and how we respond to it,
either in the silence,
or in our actual lived experience.

All of our meanings are projections.
What we say something "means"
is what we say it means,
is what it means to us,
and our collective meanings
are meanings we share because
our culture--
the people we run with,
admire, respect, adore--
create a perceptive atmosphere
in which things are seen in a similar way,
and the Yankees are the best team in baseball,
or the worst team ever,
neither position having anything to do
with the actual Yankees,
who have nothing to do with the Yankees
of fifty years ago or fifty years in the future,
but everything to do with us and who we hang with now.

Seeing our seeing shows us who we are
and how it is with us.
What we do about that is up to us.

The perennial questions our experience asks of us are,
"What response will you make?"
and 
"Why that and not something else instead?"

Our life is the answer to both questions.

May it reflect our reflections
and our intent and purposes,
our entire life long.

–0–

03

There is stimulus and response,
action and reaction,
in an eternal cycle
of cause and effect,
without beginning or end,
with one effect
being the cause
of the next effect,
and action without initiation
by some stimulus
being hard to imagine.

The way we respond 
to what is happening,
influences what happens next.

What response shall we make?
How do we know?
How do we decide?
In light of what do we live?
How do we determine
what needs to happen,
when it needs to happen,
how it needs to happen?

Does thinking about it help,
or hamper,
enable,
or impede?

When is spontaneity appropriate
and called for,
and when is it "knee-jerk"
and out of place? 

What guides our boat on its path
through the sea?
What are we doing?
Anticipation goes a long way,
but who can be so savvy
as to see what is coming 
and what should be done about it
time after time?

We are stuck too often
to making our best guess
on the run
and hoping for the best,
then doing what can be done
to correct what we just did,
time after time.

I started making better
decisions when I stopped 
having to make decisions
of more import than
"What's for lunch?" and
"What's for dinner?"

I am absolutely brilliant
with nothing hanging in the balance
or on the line.

Give me,
"Do I get a haircut today
or tomorrow?"
and watch me shine.

–0–

04

We stand between the dichotomies
and dualities,
and reconcile the contradictions
and polarities,
and make the peace
by integrating the opposites
and being the one
who sees the wholeness
hiding within the parts
in a "Thou Art That,"
and a "This, Too. This, Too,"
kind of way.

The Buddhist doctrine of No Duality,
creates the very thing it denies.
To say, "Not That! This!"
is to fashion a duality as we watch.
Suffering and an End to Suffering
is a ground level duality
at the heart of Buddhism.

Enlightenment and Illusion
is another.

Illumination and Unseeing
is another.

Duality is everywhere,
and we make the connections
that create oneness, wholeness--
like music creating oneness, wholeness,
between two dancers.

–0–

05

I am a firm believer in the Developmental Tasks.
Each stage of life comes complete
with Developmental Tasks,
placed strategically along the way
to bring us forth,
grow us up some more again,
and prepare us for the next round of Tasks
at the next level of life.

Going to work at the time to go to work
teaches us things we could not otherwise
be taught.

Being married at the time to be married
teaches us more things we could not otherwise
be taught.

Having children at the time to have children
does the same thing.

Watching the children grow up and leave home
and take their place in the world
does the same thing.

Getting older with all that is implied thereby
does the same thing.

Approaching death, with the help of sickness
and physical ailments, does the same thing.

We cannot skip a stage or avoid the tasks
and be who we would be by paying full price
and riding the entire ride.

The stages and the tasks are for us
as the Cyclops was for Ulysses.

Joseph Campbell said, 
"It took the Cyclops to bring out the hero in Ulysses."

So it is with us and the Developmental Tasks.