September 07-C, 2022

Left Mitten Sunset 09/25/2007 Oil Paint Rendered — Arches National Park, Moab, Utah
We can trust ourselves to know
when to stop pouring--
and we have no idea of what we are doing.

We have to know
that we can trust ourselves
to that which knows within,
and step into the completely unknown.

This is stepping into the Mystery,
trusting ourselves to the completely unknown
"Knower" within,
and doing what we "know" needs to be done,
when, where and how it needs to be done,
even though we don't know how we know
or even what makes us think we know.

We have to bear the agony of not-knowing
that we know what we are doing,
and do, anyway, nevertheless, even so,
what we "know" needs to be done.

We live at the mercy of what we know-not
all of the time.

"The spirit is like the wind
that blows where it will,"
means neither the spirit nor the wind
know what they are doing,
but they both do what they "know" needs to be done,
anyway, nevertheless, even so.

We do not have a clue.
We cannot explain, defend, justify, excuse
any choice we make
in "knowing" what needs to be done.

We live "on faith" in ourselves,
in our ability to "know" when to quit pouring,
and when to do what, where and how,
and step into the day,
and into each situation as it arises
throughout the day,
every day,
for the rest of our life.

Bearing the agony of knowing that we know-not,
and refusing to allow that to stop us
or even slow us down,
trusting ourselves to what we do not know
all the way.

If we can live like that,
we have it made.


Published by jimwdollar

I'm retired, and still finding my way--but now, I don't have to pretend that I know what I'm doing. I retired after 40.5 years as a minister in the Presbyterian Church USA, serving churches in Louisiana, Mississippi and North Carolina. I graduated from Austin Presbyterian Theological Seminary, in Austin, Texas, and Northwestern State University in Natchitoches, Louisiana. My wife, Judy, and I have three daughters and five granddaughters within about twenty minutes from where we live--and are enjoying our retirement as much as we have ever enjoyed anything.

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