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Preferences without expectations or demands will go a long way toward peace, balance and harmony. But. This works only where there is mutual respect for, and commitment to, the common good. Where that is lacking, that is where the police and the military come in. Everything depends upon our ability to enforce compliance to the agreements that hold us together. Without the good faith participation of all in the creation and maintenance of an atmosphere/environment that respects/honors the rights of everyone to their rights to a life they find to be pleasing-- without interfering with others' rights to that kind of life for themselves-- it all goes to hell in short order. We owe it to each other to care about the good of the other as much as we care about our own good. That is the basis of our life together.
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01

People group together around their ideas of how things ought to be. Which is how they wish they were. Which has a somewhat tangential relationship with how things are. The more people in the group, the less agreement there is about pretty much everything. Unless the group doesn't allow disagreement, or questions, or variations from the authority of those in control of the group. Insisting that everyone see things like the leaders see things is the grounding agreement for peace and harmony. The moment different opinions and points of view are permitted, it all goes to hell in a hurry. Democracy is doomed from the start. "Okay, we can all be free to live our own life with the same rights and privileges as everyone else, but we all have to agree that the majority rules." And then we get Trump and the GOP suing to have an election overturned where the majority (by 7 million votes) voted him out of office. How are we going to make this work? "Good fences make good neighbors," said Robert Frost. What I do on my side of the fence is my business, and what you do on your side of the fence is your business. I won't mess with your life, and you don't mess with mine. That would work except for the color of my skin, or my preference for a life partner, or my right to have an abortion, then somehow my business becomes your business. How does that happen? I'm on my side of the fence. What are you doing in my back yard? In my bedroom? How did my business become your business? How is it that I cannot trust you to abide by our common agreements? Freedom of religion means I am free from your religion. So, keep your religion to yourself on your side of the fence! We can live together only if you stay on your side of the fence! When people in democracy keep trying to impose their ideas of how other people ought to live their life on other people. there is no democracy. Democracy respects lines separating people and their business from other people and their business-- and requires everyone to mind their own business. Sounds simple enough.