Jim Dollar's Photography and Philosophy

I come from people 
who were not true to themselves.

Who lived out their lifetimes
being who someone else 
thought they ought to be.

I learned from their mistakes,
and drew my own lines,
but not early enough.

There were severe penalties
for attempting to draw lines
too early.

I came to know that life
is living our own life,
bringing our own true nature
to life in the life we are living.

Too few people want to bring
their own nature to life in their life.
They are looking for action.
Any kind of action.
Mostly, action that takes their mind
off their life.
And fuels their dreams of some other, finer, grander
life than the one they are living.

To be alive is to tenderly tend the life
that needs living,
tucked away in our original nature.

Too many people are ashamed of who they are,
ashamed of who they are afraid they are,
and want to be somebody else,
somebody worthy
that everyone loves, instead.

The need to be loved propels people
past themselves in their quest
to be someone everyone loves.

Elvis Presley asked his spiritual advisor,
"How can I tell whether they love me
or Elvis Presley?"

Nailed it.

If we want people to love us
we only have to love people.
And be true to our own true nature.
Allowing everything to fall into place
around those two things.
Over time.

Nothing instantaneous is worth having. 
Instant coffee comes to mind.

–0–

Nature does its thing
as long as it can,
and then when a species or two
runs out of living room,
and is no longer able to meet
the cost of living,
nature comes up with other players
and goes on with the game--
even when that means abandoning
entire solar systems.

Life plays out here
and picks up there.
Is nature's way.

Nature doesn't have anything at stake
in this person,
or this species,
or this planet,
or this solar system.

And when the entire universe
runs out of living room,
nature starts over.

Which gets us to me and you
and what keeps us going,
and what's our plan
for the rest of our life
until we run out of living room
and can no longer meet the cost of living?

It comes down to two fundamental
reason's for living:
Drugs/Sex/Alcohol/Money/Sex/Shopping/etc.
and Reflection/Recognition/Realization/Response
on the Field of Action.

Both of these reasons for living
require us to come to terms with
the central place compromise plays
in the process.

Life forces compromise upon us
were we have to give up this to have that.
We give things up a little at a time,
until we run out of living room
and can no longer meet the cost of living.

In the meantime, what?
Knowing that ultimately it all comes to an end,
what do we do in the meantime?

I suggest living as though we will live forever,
for as long as we are able.

I'm going to do my thing
as long as I can,
as well as I can,
and then let it all go.

And I suggest this as a proper way of life
for anyone interested in that kind of thing.

All of this comes about here/now
in light of the necessity of compromise
requiring reflection/recognition/realization
upon me in the right here right now
time of my life.

Those of you who have been with me for fifteen minutes
know that my foundation is
have nothing to do with theology/dogma/doctrine/creeds/etc.
and settle into finding your own way
to knowing/being who you are and what is yours to do
in each situation as it arises,
and let that be that.

Well, that is fine as far as it goes,
but it leaves unaddressed the ultimate question:
How are you going to pay the bills?
Or better, if you all listened to me
and did what I advise about finding your own way,
how am I going to pay my bills?

Theology/dogma/doctrine/creeds/etc.
paid all my bills during my working years,
and continues to help paying them via my pension
and medical insurance in my retirement.

And, as people increasingly give themselves
to finding their own way,
the source of my funding is evaporating,
making for dicey times around the homestead,
and promising even more dicey times
in the not so distant future.

The situation has no solution.
The church cannot be the church and pay the bills.
No one's spirituality has fed, clothed and housed them
over the course of their life.
We all have to meet the cost of living 
any way we can.

The situation is easier for me
because I'm approaching the end 
of a viable life
and don't have much to lose.

My wife looks at things differently,
not wanting to lose sooner than necessary
her connection with our children,
grandchildren and whatever great grandchildren there may be.

So, I'm staying around as long as necessary.

Doing my thing as though I am going to live forever.
Smiling at the very idea of living forever.

–0–

What's important?
What's happening?
What's called for?

Answering these three questions correctly
in each situation as it arises
is all we ever need to do.

Why is that so difficult?

–0–

We find our own way,
taking our cues from 
the way life requires to be lived,
playing the "Is this me or not me?" game
from one choice to the next.

Forced choices are not choices at all,
just places where we don't get to choose
what we do about what's happening.

What to do about what's happening
is how we express/find who we are,
and where we shine,
and where we have no business being,
and what we have no business doing.

Our life is at its best 
when we are aligned
with its direction and flow,
at one with who we are
and what we are doing.

It is at its worst
when we are at the mercy
of events and circumstances
between the clashing rocks
on the heaving waves of the wine dark sea,
with nothing but forced choices
compelling us to be and do 
in ways at odds with who we are
and what we are built for.

When the accountant 
is working for rent money
behind a bar in a dive,
it is a bad day every day,
and what's to be done then?

It is the right kind of emptiness,
stillness and silence all the way.

The accountant has to find the way
back to the Tao--the flow of life--
one small step/decision at a time,
listening, looking, sensing, feeling
"Me or not me?"
With every choice that is not forced.
And being right about 
what is me and not me,
and finding out how much she/he 
can get by with 
in the time left for living.

–0–

William Wordsworth nailed it 
with his, 
"The world is too much with us late and soon..."
and its lament regarding
our lost connection with nature
and nature's way of getting things done.

"We have lost the magic,"
he would say,
or better perhaps,
"We have traded the magic
for thirty pieces of silver,
or its modern equivalent!"

The older I get,
the more unfamiliar the world becomes--
and that, I think,
is a common experience among humans
at least since the Industrial Revolution,
though I expect long before,
before the advent of "civilization."

The world is not a trustworthy place to be.

I have seen it in the eyes
of my six-month old great grand daughter,
and regret her coming encounter
with the world beyond mom and dad
and their extended families,
as she enters day care or "preschool"
and the regimen/realities 
that come with it.

Do we ever out-grow what we lose
in that "bargain"?

Barbara Navarro's work in protesting
the loss of life and a way of life
among the indigenous Yanomami people
to gold "miners" in South America
highlights the world of a small tribe
of families where the children
never leave home in our sense of the word,
but live out their lives within the "family"
providing stability and security
with no preschool, etc. to intrude.

The love of money is destroying their world,
and there is no fair exchange in that transaction.

We have lost what they are losing,
without noticing/grieving/knowing
what we do not have.

But something knows within,
and we carry the burden of our alienation
from what something knows
throughout our life,
knowing only that something is not right,
and not-knowing what to do about it.

The old Yogis and Taoist/Zen masters
withdrew into the silence
of the lost world of Yin/Yang,
seeking the balance and harmony,
the stability and security,
of their ancestors way of life.

Aren't we all drawn to the AUM
of union with the source and goal
of life and being?
To know the peace of our belonging
to our place in "the great scheme of things,"
now beyond recovery,
beyond remembering
past the sense that this is not it
and never will be again?

To know this much is to mourn our state,
and follow the old Yogis, Taoist/Zen masters
into silence seeking the way 
to peace and wholeness
through recognition and realization,
walking two paths at the same time
in acquiescing to what has been lost,
while consciously adjusting to what now is
in a "We're not in Kansas anymore" kind of way.

Making the best of what we have to work with
through rituals,
ceremonial objects,
stories,
and small communities of like-minded people,
grounded and centered upon
"Here we are now what?"
as we find our way through this world,
knowing that our place is with that world
before this one became what it is. 

–0–

Reading the situation as it arises
without our own wants and desires,
fear and anxiety
getting in the way,
and responding appropriately
to the occasion,
time after time,
is all there is to it.

That's all Jesus and the Buddha, etc.
ever did.

Reduced to its essence, 
we get: See-Do.

Expanded a bit it becomes:
Listen/Hear, Look/See, Know/Realize, Do.

Drawing lines are appropriate to all occasions,
and our needs carry equal weight
to those of the situation.
We make a judgment call as to who gets what/now
and who gets what/then,
working to be balanced over time.

Drawing appropriate lines
would solve most of the problems
that exist worldwide.

–0–

Nothing is more important 
than finding and living aligned with
the flow of our life--
which means finding and living
the life that is our life to live,
finding and doing our thing
within the circumstances of our life.

My thing is hermenutics,
getting to the bottom of it all,
beginning with this moment,
here and now,
moment after moment,
meeting the moment
and doing what is asked of me by it,
in it--
while dealing with all the things
in the moment trying to knock me off
my thing,
and make me forget who I am
and what I am about,
here and now,
moment after moment.

Our first order of business
is to find our life and live it,
to find what is ours to do
with the skill set we possess,
our original nature
and the virtues/characteristics 
that are built into our DNA,
and do it here/now
all our life long.

Instead, we look for some pay-off,
some benefit/advantage/reward,
and wonder when it is going to be
our turn,
screw the moment and its need of us
to grace it with our presence
here/now all our life long.

And so, the need to find our live
and live it,
to find our thing and do it
with fealty,
liege loyalty
and filial devotion,
here/now all our life long.

–0–

My business is being
empty, still and quiet.
Being busy being
empty, still and quiet.

It helps to have an environment
that supports
emptiness, stillness, and silence.

Try finding one of those
on your next day off!

It's noise everywhere we go--
wherever people are, noise is.
Except for Quaker Meeting Houses.

Even there, it is a rare thing
to find emptiness and stillness
at work in the silence.

As empty as the space between
exhale and inhale.

As still as a cat stalking a bird.
Still and focused.
Not on stillness,
but on the bird.
And the bird's equivalent,
in our case.

Watching/looking/listening
for what arises in the silence,
for what moves in the silence,
with urgency and vitality
and us in mind.

We are but servants
of urgency and vitality,
yet, we think we are 
captains of our own ship,
masters of our own destiny,
responsible for our own
happiness and well-being,
which, of course, 
flow from getting what we want
and having our way,
which leads to having it made,
whatever that means.

This is where emptiness comes in,
as empty as the space between
exhale and inhale,
empty of want and desire,
fear and anxiety.
Waiting, watching, looking, listening
for urgency and vitality
never mind the cost to us personally.

"If you would be my people,
pick up your own cross daily
and come with me."

Oh, yes, the cross.

Death to our way of life,
resurrection to life abundant,
flowing over, pouring out,
in each situation as it arises,
as servants of urgency and vitality,
calling us,
claiming us,
in the emptiness, stillness, silence.

Life calling us to life.
Past all of our ideas
of how life should be.

The path from Eden 
leads to Gethsemane.
We are Adam and Eve
on our way to becoming Jesus--
via emptiness, stillness, silence
and grace.

The grace that is a natural confirmation
of life being lived.
Wonder, amazement and mystery,
ever-present companions
where life is being lived.

–0–

Sit down,
be quiet,
and watch what occurs to you
without being engaged by it.

Notice the things that keep coming up
with a particular urgency about them
and tend to those things.

Allow yourself to respond to the urgent matters
and to take care of the routine
affairs of the day in their own time.

I've known the car has to be serviced for weeks,
but other things were more urgent,
and now the car gets its turn.

Everything according to its own urgency.
All in due time.

–0–

Our luck improves
when we stop pushing it,
and simply attend what needs
our attention,
doing what is called for
in each situation as it arises,
and relaxing into trusting our luck
to be what it needs to be
when we allow things to go
the way they need to go.

Pushing,
shoving,
forcing,
striving,
create resistence
in an "equal and opposite force" sense,
and we produce opposition to our way
by trying to have it.

The trick is to not have a way,
just see what needs to happen
and what can happen,
and assist what needs to be
in becoming what can be,
and let that be that.

Allowing things to be the way they are
is the biggest contribution we can make
in helping things become what they need to be. 

–0–

Two Canadian researchers writing a philosophy of health
defined health as "ease of functioning."

I have expanded that definition by adding
"in the service of the joy of life."

We have to be doing
what brings joy to life in our life
if we would be healthy.

What would that be for you?

For me it would be writing myself into being 
each day,
and taking/toying/playing with the images
that I include with my writing.

Reading the right kind of book,
listening to the right kind of music
(Not while reading)
and engaging in the right kind of conversation
are also joys.

Drinking the right kind of coffee
and eating the right kind of food,
looking out the window,
etc.

The list has to be adapted to my ease of functioning,
and as the aging process
reduces my physical abilities,
my joy of life will dwindle
to the point of being ready
for death when it comes.

Being able to talk--and laugh--
about the way things are,
helps me accommodate myself to them
as time goes by.

And that means having the right kind of people
in my life
to hear what I have to say
and laugh along with me
all the way.

I think the right kind of companionship/company
is essential to our health 
and well-being,
and I appreciate your playing that role 
in my life!

–0–

Seeking the still point
at the center of the path
that can only be recognized
as the path in hindsight
is the balance point
between past and future--
the here/now 
in each situation as it arises,
through all of the circumstances
of our life,
the transition point
between then and not yet,
where we are most alive,
most awake,
most aware,
when we open ourselves
to what's what,
and what's happening,
and what's called for,
and dance with the time and place
of our being,
knowing "there is only the dance"
(TS Eliot).

–0–