July 08, 2023 – A

We all stand in need of atonement
which cannot be administered by another
or by faith of any kind,
but only by dying ourselves
the death that Adam and Eve had to die
to get back into Eden--
the death that has nothing to do with
one's last breath
and the cessation of mobility
and the coroner confirming our passing
with "I hereby declare thee DEAD!"

The kind of death that atones for 
all that we have done and failed to do
that requires atonement
is that called for by knowing full well
what we have/have not done
and bearing the full burden of our failure
to be who/what was needed in the moment of truth,
unable to say anything other 
than "I am the one."

We bear the weight of that confession
and walk with a limp
because of it
for the rest of our days.

We don't have a proper ceremony for confession
and admission of failure to be 
who we have been asked to be 
by our circumstances.

The pissy little prayers of confession
in the Liturgical Orders of the Lord's Day 
in Christian churches
are much too easily read
and much too quickly dismissed
with a flighty little "I declare to you
that we are forgiven!"

A wave of the hand
and a "There, now. That's done."
Helps no one.

I'm talking about the need for atonement
that goes beyond anything Jesus could do
with his death on the cross.
Even Jesus declared this to be so with his,
"If you would be my disciple,
pick up your own cross
and follow me,"
as he walked the path that led to Golgotha.

Everybody dies in that man's service,
as everybody must
in squaring ourselves up with who we are
and what we have done and left undone.

Need I mention what we did to native Americans?
Need I put before us slavery and the awful wrong 
that was and is still to this very day?
Need I bring homelessness to our attention?
Global Warming?
Hiroshima?
Nagasaki?
The US Japanese interment during WWII?
   
And the long list of all that is wrong about us
and the way we live,
and move,
and have our being--
including allowing ourselves to be relieved 
of the guilt of all these things
by a hand raised above us
and a declaration of forgiveness?

Death is the only thing that will do.
A metaphorical death.
A symbolic death.
Tears in the shower.
Eyes wide open through the night.
Knowing, knowing who we are.
What we have/have not done.
Confessing again and again,
"I, I am the one!"

With thankfully none to wave their hand
and glibly utter, "You are forgiven! Amen!"

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